I’m very comfortable in silence–the silence of others, the silence of stillness, the silence of being alone. The unaccompanied, unhurried, uncomplicated independence gained through a oneness with yourself is akin to silence. There are no outside opinions, no compromises, no influences, no concessions, a complete separation from others in an effort to understand and enjoy the silence of self. Being alone does not mean you are lonely. 

The quarantine during the pandemic has really taken its toll on some people. Isolation is something a lot of people aren’t used to and don’t like. Aloneness has been given a negative connotation in our society. Something must be inherently wrong with you for you to be alone. Somehow being alone makes you an outsider or on the fringes. This social stigma seems to imply that being by one’s self is awkward and bleak. That in order to be truly happy and fulfilled, you must have something or someone for a sense of security. 

Some don’t like to be left with their thoughts or left to their own devices. Could that stem from a certain discomfort with one’s self? Many people don’t like silence because it’s revealing and they don’t want to be alone because they fear their own company isn’t enough. It’s those fears and feelings that hold us back from meaningful communion with ourselves. Society doesn’t encourage the idea of being alone and sitting in your silence, so part of the fear is literally the fact that you’ve never done it before.

Being alone, still, and silent allows you to gain the freedom of introspection, being able to rely on your inner voice and to think for yourself. This enables you to make choices and decisions without outside influence. Of course, you can always seek advice and counsel from others, but ultimately being able to consult yourself will lead to the best decision for you.  An intimate and complete relationship with yourself gives you a certain trust, reliance, and independence that you can’t get anywhere else. 

There is so much to be gained when you cut through the noise and truly become comfortable in silence, in self. It is the cornerstone of growth and development as a person. It allows you to live your life for you, nothing, and no one holding you back. Comfortable in silence doesn’t mean you don’t need anyone, and you should always be alone, but instead, it provides stability in a world where isolation is real and silence is inevitable.